The Peppermint Failure

Our dog digs. So, I bought peppermint plants.

I got the idea on the Internet. Then I confirmed that it works with the herb guy at the plant store. “Dogs hate that strong minty smell,” he said. “She definitely won’t dig near it.”

Unless you’re Star, the dog who created a little mulch nest in-between peppermint plants, her nose resting contentedly for hours within an inch of that strong minty smell she is supposed to hate.

Or Star, the dog who I discovered covered in mud, digging madly around one of the sprinklers, which was spraying her directly in the face. The peppermint plant she nestled with all weekend is missing. Not a leaf of evidence that it even existed.

So, onto Plan B. Fill hole. Sprinkle with red hot Cayenne Pepper.

That Was Actually Funny, He Said

My teenager and I were sitting on the steps with the dog. It has been a dry winter, and with more than a week of warm February weather, everyone is watering. At our house, the sprinkler needed a quick fix in the yard after it fell off the hose when my son moved it from one spot to another. “I can’t get it back on.”

I was putting my shoes on to help out and hoping the dog poop had been picked up before he had watered the grass. ”If you don’t pick the poop up first, then it’s gross to pick up when the grass is wet.”

“It wasn’t me,” he said. “Dad started it. Blame Dad.”

So, I belted out a little South Park “Blame Canada!”

He chuckled. “Mom, that was actually funny… and surprising.”

“Didn’t think I had any South Park in me, did ya?”

Neighborhood Sign Posted by New Dog Owner

LOST:

One vial of puppy poop.

Our vet asked us to return with a fresh poop sample from our new puppy, so she could test her for worms and, I assume, other bacteria. So, despite my reluctance to gather the sample, I put some in the tube she gave us. I was so proud of myself!

Then I put it on the hood of my car in the garage to await our departure.

You’ve already guessed what happened. Multi-tasking mom drove off with it still on the hood of my car.

It has now gone missing.

I searched for it in the garage, on the driveway and down our entire street.

So, neighbors – especially the lovely neighbor who picks it up, wondering what it could be – I am sorry.

I am just a bit lost at the moment!

My Mid-December To-Do List

I love Christmas. I love getting gifts for my family. I even love shopping at this time of year. I love making the family calendar of photos to send to the grandparents. I get a kick out of the frenetic, insane energy in my children. I can’t wait to read their letters to Santa, which this year included nearly every item in the Lego catalogue.

Lego, you timed that mailing perfectly.

What gets me is the to-do list still hanging over my head. Most must be done in the next two days:

• Wrap and deliver gifts for adopted family in need
• 7 teacher gifts (and wrap)
• Piano teacher gift (just remembered that one!)
• Help third grader make homemade ornament
• Help second grader make homemade Secret Santa gift
• Make holiday cookies individually wrapped for third grade cookie exchange
• Drop off Character Power letter on Justice for second grade parents
• Get birthday gift for Friday’s birthday party
• Purchase team gift cards for basketball coach gifts (almost forgot that one)
• Blog
• Clean the house
• Make the extra beds for visiting family
• Grocery shop
• Get gifts for two sisters and finish the boys
• Get stocking stuffers
• Get bagels for tomorrow’s PA meeting
• Go to tomorrow’s PA meeting
• Go to last basketball game and post-season pizza party with second grader

And then…there’s the new dog. Just arrived last night. Stronger than me. Just rolled herself in poop. Keeps trying to eat the ornaments off the tree. Desperate for a holiday dog trainer.

I love Christmas. I love the feeling of excitement that fills the house. I love reading Christmas stories to the boys. I love the “is Santa real?” question. I love seeing they believe.

And I really love the dog.